Thursday, September 07, 2006
Humpty Dumpty
If I were a broken egg, I would not want king's horses trying to put me back together again. They would probably be real bad at that. Hooves, man. HOOVES. But I would feel pretty important if the King sent ALL his horses and ALL his men to try and put me back together again, even if they were extrememely poor at reconstructive egg surgery.
Monday, July 24, 2006
El Loro
Honestly. I just had mexican lunch at a restaurant called El Loro. And I can't think. We call it the El Loro coma. And I seriously thought something weird just happened to the atmospheric pressurization around my head right now. Keep in touch. I should be able to blog again soon after this coma runs its course.
Monday, April 24, 2006
Devil's Advocate
I was hanging out in the men's room today when a man walked in and told a work buddy of his that "someone just told me they were playing devil's advocate, all that really means is that they wanted to say something but not be responsible for it." While I pretty much have come to the conclusion that he doens't mean that he is playing "Devil's advocate" from the movie with Al Pacino and Keanu Reeves. And since the "advocate" refers to the Devil Al Pacino's son, played by Keanu Reeves, he means that he is taking the position of Keanu Reeves, who also played Neo in the Matrix and Ted, in Bill and Ted's blah blah Adventure or whatever. And by saying that he was Keanu Reeves he was also taking the position of Ted in those "bogus" movies, in which Ted rarely takes any responsibility for much of anything, therefore, he is playing "Keanu Reeves as the devil's advocate who also played Ted who never takes any responsbility, so I can say whaever I want."
To the contrary, I think the man in the men's room was actually referring to the fact that when you play the "devil's advocate," you are just making sure that the discussion includes a point of view which the advocate in question does not actually back up. But this naysayer believes that every time someone says that, they are actually just shirking all responsibilty just so they can get their point of view out there without actually having to fess up to all the negative impact that point of view might face. But is that always the case?
I think one could genuinely want to take a look at opposing view points even if that one did not support them. Part of a responsible decision making process should always include that aspect, shouldn't it? I suppose it's possible that it gets down to what your internal motivations are for taking any certain action. Do you actually compeltely not support something if you mention it, or is there a small part of you that supports that point of view?
I'm going to play the Devil's advocate here and say that you sure can play the Devil's advocate, and not support something, especially when you rock out on the air guitar anytime something cool happens, dude.
To the contrary, I think the man in the men's room was actually referring to the fact that when you play the "devil's advocate," you are just making sure that the discussion includes a point of view which the advocate in question does not actually back up. But this naysayer believes that every time someone says that, they are actually just shirking all responsibilty just so they can get their point of view out there without actually having to fess up to all the negative impact that point of view might face. But is that always the case?
I think one could genuinely want to take a look at opposing view points even if that one did not support them. Part of a responsible decision making process should always include that aspect, shouldn't it? I suppose it's possible that it gets down to what your internal motivations are for taking any certain action. Do you actually compeltely not support something if you mention it, or is there a small part of you that supports that point of view?
I'm going to play the Devil's advocate here and say that you sure can play the Devil's advocate, and not support something, especially when you rock out on the air guitar anytime something cool happens, dude.
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Broken lunch break
My lunch break, by Justin Roth
-Part I-
So I realized I left the large lunch I packed for myself at home in the refrigerator. So I took my lunch break going home to go get the lunch, rather than spend about $9 to purchase a comparable amount of food at the cafeteria here. So I get home open the fridge and pull out a nearly empty large ziplock baggie. All that's left is 2 yogurt cups and a protein powder bag.
I do some detective work (calling my mom) and found out she took the majority of the lunch I painstakingly put together the night before. I was kind to her on the phone, but I got off and yelled. I proceeded to take an orange out of the fridge to begin reassembling the lunch, but realized the last of my Grandmother's huckleberry jam was on the sandwich that was now in my mother's possesion. This revelation pushed me over the top and I pounded the orange with all my might. The orange dissasembled all over my shirt and pants and I began tearing into it with my mouth. I then dropped the orange into the sink, open side down, so I decided to chuck it into the garbage disposal with fervor. And what a chuck it was.
After this, I quickly assembled some tuna, a pb sandwich and a cup of yogurt to scarf down before I had to rush off back to work.
-Part II-
After putting down the calories needed to survive the rest of the work day, I headed back to work. On my way I thought about how much fun it would be to have some new, good music to listen to. I was currently listening to a bootleg live John Mayer show, so, I thought, why the heck not? I took a detour to Best Buy on the way to work to check out the John Mayer section, but much to my dismay, I didn't like the prices or the content, really. Until I came across his first CD, Inside Wants Out. Just a few tracks on there, but they are mostly all accoustic and it was only $10. But one CD? It just didn't feel right. I decided to browse the rest of the music to see if something popped out... Bob Dylan, not this time, although I really do need to catch up on the last 400 years of his stuff. Rolling Stones... no... but same story. I wanted something that I hadn't heard before. Something that was kinda catchy, but I wasn’t going to hear on KDWB, either original or sampled by Kanye. Then I saw The Derek Trucks Band, a prodigy out of the Almann Bros. family, I was introduced to some of his live stuff about a year ago. I loved what I had heard, and found out this CD had just come out this year... I was sold.
I ripped into it in the parking lot as some teeny girl and her oily haired boyfriend blasted Eminem next to me. Not that I hate the Slim Shady, but I couldn't wait to drown it out with some good, bluesy, soulful licks by Trucks. As soon as it entered the CD player, I was better. What orange? Who's sandwich? I had completely forgotten.
Moral of the story: Buy Derek Trucks music when you have a bad lunch break . . .
============
Confusing sub plot:
So I was checking out at Best Buy, and the girl looked at my ID and said "wow, you're young." I was dumbfounded. What the hell do you say to that? I was just like "ok..." And then she said "Well you look so (something something-can't remember relating to old)" and I was like "Well, that's what years of hard work and stress can do to you." She laughed. I said "well, I wouldn’t call it hard work, but you know." And she elevated her chuckle. That's all. Just funny. I didn't know what to make of someone calling me "young." Dissasemble that, fist.
-Part I-
So I realized I left the large lunch I packed for myself at home in the refrigerator. So I took my lunch break going home to go get the lunch, rather than spend about $9 to purchase a comparable amount of food at the cafeteria here. So I get home open the fridge and pull out a nearly empty large ziplock baggie. All that's left is 2 yogurt cups and a protein powder bag.
I do some detective work (calling my mom) and found out she took the majority of the lunch I painstakingly put together the night before. I was kind to her on the phone, but I got off and yelled. I proceeded to take an orange out of the fridge to begin reassembling the lunch, but realized the last of my Grandmother's huckleberry jam was on the sandwich that was now in my mother's possesion. This revelation pushed me over the top and I pounded the orange with all my might. The orange dissasembled all over my shirt and pants and I began tearing into it with my mouth. I then dropped the orange into the sink, open side down, so I decided to chuck it into the garbage disposal with fervor. And what a chuck it was.
After this, I quickly assembled some tuna, a pb sandwich and a cup of yogurt to scarf down before I had to rush off back to work.
-Part II-
After putting down the calories needed to survive the rest of the work day, I headed back to work. On my way I thought about how much fun it would be to have some new, good music to listen to. I was currently listening to a bootleg live John Mayer show, so, I thought, why the heck not? I took a detour to Best Buy on the way to work to check out the John Mayer section, but much to my dismay, I didn't like the prices or the content, really. Until I came across his first CD, Inside Wants Out. Just a few tracks on there, but they are mostly all accoustic and it was only $10. But one CD? It just didn't feel right. I decided to browse the rest of the music to see if something popped out... Bob Dylan, not this time, although I really do need to catch up on the last 400 years of his stuff. Rolling Stones... no... but same story. I wanted something that I hadn't heard before. Something that was kinda catchy, but I wasn’t going to hear on KDWB, either original or sampled by Kanye. Then I saw The Derek Trucks Band, a prodigy out of the Almann Bros. family, I was introduced to some of his live stuff about a year ago. I loved what I had heard, and found out this CD had just come out this year... I was sold.
I ripped into it in the parking lot as some teeny girl and her oily haired boyfriend blasted Eminem next to me. Not that I hate the Slim Shady, but I couldn't wait to drown it out with some good, bluesy, soulful licks by Trucks. As soon as it entered the CD player, I was better. What orange? Who's sandwich? I had completely forgotten.
Moral of the story: Buy Derek Trucks music when you have a bad lunch break . . .
============
Confusing sub plot:
So I was checking out at Best Buy, and the girl looked at my ID and said "wow, you're young." I was dumbfounded. What the hell do you say to that? I was just like "ok..." And then she said "Well you look so (something something-can't remember relating to old)" and I was like "Well, that's what years of hard work and stress can do to you." She laughed. I said "well, I wouldn’t call it hard work, but you know." And she elevated her chuckle. That's all. Just funny. I didn't know what to make of someone calling me "young." Dissasemble that, fist.
Sunday, April 02, 2006
i debate
Foriegn policy. The best movie of the season. What's the new black? The content changes, but there's always a debate surrounding these topics. Right now these topics are being discussed. Years down the road, people at large tables with expensive clothes on will still be talking about these topics. But right now there's a debate going on that is new to the social landscape. It is the debate of the decade: which I-pod is better? (or more generally, which .mp3 player is better?)
Everyone has an opinion. Even that weird looking kid on the corner whose pants are too tight. But I wouldn't listen to him. He doesn't even like hot dogs. And he's a kid. That's not natural. And his opinions are probably influenced by which one Sponge Bob has, anyways.
Of course your i-choice depends on the i-needs that you have for an i-mp3 player (apple adds the "i" to everything, why can't "i"?). Even though different players are right for different people, owners of a mini music box will defend their fav as the best against all competition. Someone who owns the 30 gig i pod video will defend the massive memory size to the death, while those who own a smaller more portable version will defend its specific benefits. It's actually pretty entertaining.
Just last night I heard a plethora of different reasons to get a certain kind instead of another. For instance, the shuffle makes it too hard to pick out a certain song you want to hear. But of course the huge i pod videos cost 3 car payments. The Zen Micro is the best choice, because... "something something blah something," ... can't remember. But you get the point. Everyone's got their iron-clad opinion.
I'm not going to lie. I own one, but I feel a draw towards the nano. Smaller and cheaper, but still holds a good stack of CDs. But the little monster on my shoulder says "no! - don't banish yourself to the deep throes of "can't-fit-my-whole-CD-collection-on-that-i-Pod" hell!!! Buy more gigabytes!" Then another monster, somewhat more intelligent and more consumer-reports informed metions "That i-pod doesn't even play .ogg files and .flac files. You have a ton of music in those formats." Where to turn as a .mp3-player virgin?
Maybe the real debate should be, how will I continue to listen to my music? I've been listening to CDs my whole life. Who need's an .mp3 player when you've got CD players everywhere? Yeah yeah yeah... I know, portablilty isn't a strong suit for the 3-foot wide stereo in my bedroom. Well another debate for another time . . .
Everyone has an opinion. Even that weird looking kid on the corner whose pants are too tight. But I wouldn't listen to him. He doesn't even like hot dogs. And he's a kid. That's not natural. And his opinions are probably influenced by which one Sponge Bob has, anyways.
Of course your i-choice depends on the i-needs that you have for an i-mp3 player (apple adds the "i" to everything, why can't "i"?). Even though different players are right for different people, owners of a mini music box will defend their fav as the best against all competition. Someone who owns the 30 gig i pod video will defend the massive memory size to the death, while those who own a smaller more portable version will defend its specific benefits. It's actually pretty entertaining.
Just last night I heard a plethora of different reasons to get a certain kind instead of another. For instance, the shuffle makes it too hard to pick out a certain song you want to hear. But of course the huge i pod videos cost 3 car payments. The Zen Micro is the best choice, because... "something something blah something," ... can't remember. But you get the point. Everyone's got their iron-clad opinion.
I'm not going to lie. I own one, but I feel a draw towards the nano. Smaller and cheaper, but still holds a good stack of CDs. But the little monster on my shoulder says "no! - don't banish yourself to the deep throes of "can't-fit-my-whole-CD-collection-on-that-i-Pod" hell!!! Buy more gigabytes!" Then another monster, somewhat more intelligent and more consumer-reports informed metions "That i-pod doesn't even play .ogg files and .flac files. You have a ton of music in those formats." Where to turn as a .mp3-player virgin?
Maybe the real debate should be, how will I continue to listen to my music? I've been listening to CDs my whole life. Who need's an .mp3 player when you've got CD players everywhere? Yeah yeah yeah... I know, portablilty isn't a strong suit for the 3-foot wide stereo in my bedroom. Well another debate for another time . . .
Monday, March 06, 2006
Hours in a day
So the other day I picked up the first season of 24 with Keifer Sutherland (it was on sale for $20 at Target, ususally $45). I can't get enough of it. The action is fast, the story line is enticing and the acting is... well, it's acting. And the best part is, no commercials. No sweating it out for 7 days waiting for the next hour of the story.
You gotta love 80s (early 90s?) superstar Keifer Sutherland making a splash again on pop culture. Has he really done anything worth our time since Young Guns? I think the attitude of his character reflects his mini come-back. His pent up agression for getting lame, straight-to-video movies comes out when he tells his opponents to drop their weapons, or what he'll do to them if they don't do what he says, etc... (I'll tread carefully, Three Musketeers was awesome.) Keifer has found his place. And we love it.
But one thing that seems kind of far fetched is all the events that happen in one 24-hour period. Honestly, Bauer's daughter was kidnapped, like 32 times in one day. Let's get some damn agents on that girl!
You gotta love 80s (early 90s?) superstar Keifer Sutherland making a splash again on pop culture. Has he really done anything worth our time since Young Guns? I think the attitude of his character reflects his mini come-back. His pent up agression for getting lame, straight-to-video movies comes out when he tells his opponents to drop their weapons, or what he'll do to them if they don't do what he says, etc... (I'll tread carefully, Three Musketeers was awesome.) Keifer has found his place. And we love it.
But one thing that seems kind of far fetched is all the events that happen in one 24-hour period. Honestly, Bauer's daughter was kidnapped, like 32 times in one day. Let's get some damn agents on that girl!
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Driving with Rope 2: Thinner Rope
-You read the original.
-You couldn't get enough.
-Brought to you by the producer of Driving with Rope and Fit to Post comes the sequel to Driving with Rope, Driving with Rope 2: Thinner Rope.
I picked up my Hyundai Tucson the other day after having the gas pedal replaced. Read the original if you don't know the story. But as I am driving back to my house, I start to turn the corner and I step on my gas pedal to speed up. I heard a snap, and the resistance I was so accustomed to once again was not there. I was however, somewhat accustomed to this
experience as well. So I calmly reached down and felt around to see if my suspicions were correct; that I had once again snapped my gas pedal. I picked it up again, but with somewhat of a less puzzled look than last time. Similar to Indy's look at the right.My first reaction to the situation was that they had just glued the old one back on. But after coasting home and getting underneath the dash with a flashlight, I can tell this new fracture is a unique occurance of a now-frequent problem.
The guys at the dealership had the nerve to trash my former accelerator cord! Of course they may have kept it. They were pretty impressed with it. Maybe there's a shrine with my name and liscence plate number, titled "Car Mcguyver,"... but probably not.
I looked around and finally found a new rope, much thinner, and more painful. But I can really finesse with this thinner rope. I have a more solid connection with the accelrator stump. It really is amazing the knowledge you gain about how an accelrator pedal works when you have to speed up using the muscles in your forearm and hand.
I've had to drive my entire birthday weekend with a rope (thinner than the original!) to accelrate. They say that you have to travel with someone before you really get to know them. Well if you really want to get to know the accelration function of your car, bust off your gas pedal, tie a rope around it and pull, then get it fixed, then break it off again before your birthday and experience it all over again.
This writer is not responsible for broken pedals of any sort except his own. Do not actually try what this writer suggested, otherwise you are definitley 100% dumb.
Thursday, February 16, 2006
Introduction
Two months after graduation, I am now, finally getting a small introdution to the "real world." In just today, I have sent out two resumes to employers with serious interest, I have appointments set up in the next week to meet with two groups considering me for a position, met with another last week and I have another with whom I will soon be setting up a meeting. Bottom line: I am crazy busy with job opportunities. And I'm excited about them.
This being said, they are all relatively outside of what I have been trained to do in college: be a journalist. I don't think you can call yourself a journalist unless you adhere to some strict principles, and of those principles, being idealistically independent is one of them. Now I imagine as a DJ, you can make some of your own decisions (should I play Britney or Eminem?), but there's not a whole lot of investigative reporting opportunities in disc jockeying.
So it comes down to whether I am interested in taking an opportunity in which I could eventually make my way in to what I call "real journalism." Now we shouldn't make any mistakes, either. Just a couple months ago I turned down a job that was heavily based in journalism (as a newspaper reporter), but the job paid very little. I am intersted in making a living wage, not "enough to get by." And these jobs seem to give me an opportunity to make bank.
At the same time, I could put out some clips on the side (as long as there were no conflicts of interest - I am so idealistic, aren't I?). Eventually I could use those clips to show that I was interested in writing, and eventually graduate to a magazine job. But I'll keep the doors open to sticking with the corporations and making bank. You never hear about journalists retiring early and settling in St. Johns - do you?
This being said, they are all relatively outside of what I have been trained to do in college: be a journalist. I don't think you can call yourself a journalist unless you adhere to some strict principles, and of those principles, being idealistically independent is one of them. Now I imagine as a DJ, you can make some of your own decisions (should I play Britney or Eminem?), but there's not a whole lot of investigative reporting opportunities in disc jockeying.
So it comes down to whether I am interested in taking an opportunity in which I could eventually make my way in to what I call "real journalism." Now we shouldn't make any mistakes, either. Just a couple months ago I turned down a job that was heavily based in journalism (as a newspaper reporter), but the job paid very little. I am intersted in making a living wage, not "enough to get by." And these jobs seem to give me an opportunity to make bank.
At the same time, I could put out some clips on the side (as long as there were no conflicts of interest - I am so idealistic, aren't I?). Eventually I could use those clips to show that I was interested in writing, and eventually graduate to a magazine job. But I'll keep the doors open to sticking with the corporations and making bank. You never hear about journalists retiring early and settling in St. Johns - do you?
Monday, February 13, 2006
e-dating, by j-Ro
I am not in the dating world. Thank god. I have a significant other of over two years. And we have fun (I'm not trying to rub anything in... but nah na na na nah nah). I am happy for this because a coworker just told me of a harrowing experience she had this morning. At 5 a.m. (that's in the morning, when there is no sun).
I know you just thought "holy shit" in your head. I suppose there are a lot of worse things that could happen at 5 a.m., but this is more of a mind-screw than anything else.
A guy whom her friends had set her up with came over to her house for wine and a movie. They were trying to figure out a bar to go to and what else they could do, but eventually she gave up and invited the guy over for wine. That may have been a mistake, but it's not like she invited him over the Ladies' Man Leon's "dinner and a movie."
So they had their date, and she says it was a little awkward, but he thanks her, and later sends her a message about how much fun he had. Then, at 5 a.m. on a Monday morning, he sends her a text message. You know, those black-and-white-100-characters-or-less-emotionless- avoid-human-contact-I-spent-30-minutes-typing-this-into-a-phone-instead-of-calling-you things? And he said that he was still trying to get over his "x" (he saved a ton of time avoiding the "e" in ex--also used in "emotion"), that he was sorry, but he couldn't continue this relationship and that he hoped that one day she would forgive him. This text message woke her at 5 a.m., a beautiful start to a Monday.
She said after she came out of her pre-dawn haze, she couldn't help but laugh. And I don't blame her! It's been a good chuckle all day long. But it comes down to the dating game. How hard must it be to find someone who is in the right stage of their life, interested in all the right things and also finds their potential partner attractive? While we're at it, some maturity might be nice, too.
So the text-message dump was kinda rough, especially at a time before your dog even wakes you up. But at least they didn't meet online. Cause then a text-message breakup would just be downright wrong.
I know you just thought "holy shit" in your head. I suppose there are a lot of worse things that could happen at 5 a.m., but this is more of a mind-screw than anything else.
A guy whom her friends had set her up with came over to her house for wine and a movie. They were trying to figure out a bar to go to and what else they could do, but eventually she gave up and invited the guy over for wine. That may have been a mistake, but it's not like she invited him over the Ladies' Man Leon's "dinner and a movie."
So they had their date, and she says it was a little awkward, but he thanks her, and later sends her a message about how much fun he had. Then, at 5 a.m. on a Monday morning, he sends her a text message. You know, those black-and-white-100-characters-or-less-emotionless- avoid-human-contact-I-spent-30-minutes-typing-this-into-a-phone-instead-of-calling-you things? And he said that he was still trying to get over his "x" (he saved a ton of time avoiding the "e" in ex--also used in "emotion"), that he was sorry, but he couldn't continue this relationship and that he hoped that one day she would forgive him. This text message woke her at 5 a.m., a beautiful start to a Monday.
She said after she came out of her pre-dawn haze, she couldn't help but laugh. And I don't blame her! It's been a good chuckle all day long. But it comes down to the dating game. How hard must it be to find someone who is in the right stage of their life, interested in all the right things and also finds their potential partner attractive? While we're at it, some maturity might be nice, too.
So the text-message dump was kinda rough, especially at a time before your dog even wakes you up. But at least they didn't meet online. Cause then a text-message breakup would just be downright wrong.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)